I'll be here
by lenfaz
Summary: Jake and Peyton. Post season 3. One chapter story


God, I haven't done this in such a long long time. But Jake and Peyton have my heart and when saw their scenes together in S3 (thanks to Marina for that) I just knew I had to write them again. There's no other couple I love to write more than about J/P and their pure and sacrificed love.

Title: I'll be here

Disclaimer: You know by now that I don't own nothing but my worship to my one and true OTP, Jake and Peyton. The lyrics for this piece of writing come from the one band than can rip your soul with 10 sentences, Pink Floyd, Wish you were here.

Dedicated: To Marina, to all the JP fans that are still out there, wishing.

I'll be here

_So, so you think you can tell Heaven from Hell,_

_blue skies from pain.  
_

She couldn't tell anymore. As she watched her life passed by for the last few years, she could not tell the numbness from the motion, the happiness from the sadness. She could not tell one feeling from the other.

Because they were all the same without him.

Can you tell a green field from a cold steel rail?  
_A smile from a veil?  
Do you think you can tell?_

She could tell now. She could tell him that she had been so wrong, so confused. That she had not fought because it was too much to take in. She could tell him he was partly right, and that he was partly wrong. Yes, it had been her loneliness what drove her there. But it was her love for him what ended up surviving at the end. What it survived all those years. She could tell him all those things now. She had all the answers for the doubts and the questions he rightfully had. If only she could tell him…

_And did they get you to trade your heroes for ghosts?  
_

Her mind had played games at her. She'd trade her one true love for a misconception, for a ghost that was a residual from the past, for a teenage infatuation, for a feeling that nested in weakness and not in the real thing. Like the real thing they've always had. Even with the pain, the suffering and the time apart, she'd always known that what they had was real. But she was too young to make it work, to make him believe it so. She could not even figure it out herself at the time.

_Hot ashes for trees?  
Hot air for a cool breeze?  
Cold comfort for change?_

And the numb comfort she now was in, it was no longer enough. She'd parade around life for so long trying to find that feeling again and it had not worked. Because that feeling was already there. It was what she felt for him. What she'd always felt for him.

_And did you exchange a walk on part in the war for a lead role in a cage?_

And she needed to do something before she lost all the chances to have him back. She needed to find him.

_How I wish, how I wish you were here._

Wishing and hoping, she went to find him. She had to tell him all the things she'd thought about. She had to tell him about how everything went wrong without him. How nothing made sense anymore if he wasn't there, next to her, to make it work. To love her. For her to love him back.

She traveled to Savannah hoping, wondering if she would find him. If he would want to hear what she had to say. If he'd be there…

Alone she stood, facing the house that once held all of her hopes in it, the one that still held all her hopes in it. She knocked on the door as her heart was beating fast, faster than any other time.

And there he was. Same old brown hair, brown eyes. His incredible smile and his sad look. His tenderness. His soul. Her soul. He was everything she needed, standing there, a confused look on his face. He was trying to understand, without being able to mutter a word. He was speechless. But it was OK. It was her time to talk now…

"Jake…" she started hesitant, but she needed to find the strength. "I know it's probably been too long and that you probably have moved on onto something better than me. And I could not blame you if you did, but I needed to come here to tell you that you were wrong. Well, you actually were right. I was confused and I wasn't sure about things back then. But now I am. I know that you're the only one in my heart and that you'll always be, because years have passed and I cannot seem to find anybody else. Because you're still in my mind and in my heart. Because you're the one I love, Jake, and that I've always loved. And I was too young and too stupid to see it back then. You were right about me feeling lonely and that I was not ready to be there for you the way you wanted me to be, the way you deserved me to be…" she paused for a moment, trying to find the words…

_We're just two lost souls swimming in a fish bowl, year after year,  
Running over the same old ground.  
What have we found? The same old fears._

He tried to speak, but she stopped him. "Please let me finish" she said "I need to say all this and I don't know if I'll ever find the courage to do it again. I love you, Jake and if there's a chance that you'll take me back into Jenny's life and yours, I'll spent the rest of my life showing you that this is the only family I want for myself and that you're the only one I want to wake up next to. That you're the only one I want to say 'I love you' either awake or in my sleep. You're the one for whom my heart aches every single day. I need you and I love you"

"Peyton…" he started but she stopped him one more time

"Remember the song you once wrote? The one that said that someday you'll come back to me? Well, I've come back to you, Jake, and if you still want this, today can be that Someday…"

She stood there, in tears, looking into his eyes, trying to read a reaction in him.

"Jake, please say something… please tell me if you're still here"

"I'm here" he said, reaching for her face and caressing her with his hand. He continued to talk as he got closer to her, and his face was almost touching hers "and maybe today is someday. I still love you, Peyton. More than anything"

And then his lips reached hers and there was nothing else to say.


End file.
